Giving AND Receiving

"It is important to know when we should give attention and when we need attention. Often we are inclined to give, give, and give without asking anything in return. We may think that this is a sign of generosity or even heroism. But it might be little more than a proud attitude that says, 'I don't need help from others, I only want to give.' When we keep giving without receiving we burn out quickly. Only when we pay careful attention to our own physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual needs can we be, and remain, joyful givers. There is a time to give and a time to receive. We need equal time for both if we want to live healthy lives."
from Nouwen, Bread for the Journey, 7/11 entry

It seems to me that others of us give and give without ever getting anything for ourselves in return for a different reason. Some have been taught through life experiences that they have no right to exist, let alone expect anything from anyone else; so they give and give and give themselves away hoping/longing for someone to respond in kind someday. And sometimes that happens, but often not. Often they "collect" a following of those who are happy to take and take and take, and who self-centeredly seem to think that they are doing you a favor to let you serve them.

Still others feel so blessed that they cannot help but pass along the blessing with a heart of gratitude. Their cups keep overflowing so they give and give and give without any need for a return from the recipient because they are receiving what they need from another source or sources.

Pride gives only as long as it feels good to give. Unworthiness gives until it can't anymore, ending up in emptiness, depression, and isolation. Gratitude gives in response to having been given to, and enjoys the blessing of passing on what has been freely given.